Neither the blustery December winds, or the thought of Banana Basher being Hare, deterred the pack from assembling at the Jury Room for our weekly hash. Appears the staff at the Jury Room do not have a calendar, because they still had Their Halloween decorations up. Accuprick stood outside the bar trying to collect a cover charge from unsuspecting patrons. He used the excuse that he didn’t like being inside a bar with smokers. Can’t blame him there. TIMMY gave Shallow Hole slack for not coming to last week’s hash. Puff, Hugh Heifer, Wicked Retahted and Shallow Hole told tales of their misadventures at North South. Puff and Hugh reminisce about their weekend being roommates. All laugh at the story of Shallow Hole falling into a creek with her cell phone. Then she tells the miracle of how her i Phone came back to life after 3 days in a bag of rice. Cuff My Muff, Occasional Rapist, Dbased and Nipple Butt arrived and joined in the merriment. Nipple Butt had some words with a big black dog at the bar, but became friends when they found Puff with the treats. A brief appearance was made by Just Dan. He told the pack that he was meeting a friend for dinner and scurried off without having a beer. Probably ran off because he was afraid of being named. The last stragglers, Princess Diarrhea and Thmp-Thmp, showed up right before circle up.
Trail-most of the pack ran down Ocean and stumbled toward May street off Water. Down May street we went but we lost trail at Grant street park. Trail then went on down Coulson, Berry to Emeline, to Button where we we’re greeted by a barking pitbull before turning left on Brookside.
Under the freeway we went to right on Lee. Trail then went through a familiar place for me where I got named on the path under freeway bridge of hwy 1, a long but scenic path along a low water level Branciforte creek. Memories. Trail pushed on to Market and over foot bridge to Berkely street back over to Water where you could find sweaty muscle men at SC Power Fitness Gym, in the dark we could still find trail along the Branciforte Aqua Duct path to find a much desired BN signage. But holy shit it was the longest BN trail I’ve ever had to endure! My lips we’re dry and parched and I was relieved to see the pack at beer check at the end of May street.
Religion was held on May street at the old parking lot of Morgan Stanley.
Accuprick served as RA and Beer Fairy. Cuff My Muff was punished for smoking a cigarette in the circle. Hugh Heifer was congratulated for representing Surf City at North South. She was hoping to get lucky, so she brought 4 condoms with her. Sadly, she did not find her prince charming and brought back 5 condoms. Maybe she wasn’t turned on by a bunch of middle aged men in lingerie. Occasional Rapist was also congratulated on her ambassadorship at North South, but received a down down for bestiality on trail. Wicked Retahted gave kudos to Dbased for attempting the ballbuster trail at North South, not for completing it. When he got to the beer check at mile 8 and found out the trail was 16 miles, he took a short cut to merge with the eagle trail instead. Shallow Hole was brought up for falling into a not-so shallow hole at North South and for being bachelorette for a week, while Waxi Pad was in Philly. TIMMY was congratulated for being elected the new GM, and questioned about his new car. Puff The Magic Drag Queen was also recognized for representing Surf City at North South. Princess Diarrhea and Thmp-Thmp were punished for missing AGM and last weeks hash. Last but not least, the Hare, Banana Basher.
All we are is dust in the wind……………
On On,
Shallow Hole and Occasional Rapist
(Posted by dBASED using Puff’s account because Shallow Hole and Occasional Rapist do not have one yet)