Hash Trash # 820 on 9/24/15: Pussy Wood’s Virgin Hare

820haresIt was a lovely warm evening in Santa Cruz. The pack convened on the outdoor patio of Santa Cruz Mountain Brewery.  It was Pussy Wood’s Virgin Hare. She even brought a Virgin sacrifice to the occasion. Virgin Ciana didn’t know what she was in for!  Fap Jack and Pink Cherry Liquor were substitute Beer Meister this week because TIMMY!!! was on vacation. They brought a free keg of wine they got from Santa Cruz Mountain Winery.  They were giving out the free kegs to wine club members! Score!  I belong to several wine clubs and never got a bonus like that!  Probably should check them out! Free wine for all the hashers…………….

Ho to Housewife broke Pussy Wood’s cherry with a very pleasant trail on the West Side.  It was 3.5 mile loop.  The halfmind hares started out by putting a boob and package check 820boobcheckright next to Garfield Park where a bunch of little kids were playing.  There was a check near the Circle Jerk Church. Trail led to California Street and left along the dirt trail along Bay Avenue, then down National. There was a liquor check of Whaler’s rum at Lighthouse Field Park.  Cute name considering we’ve been lucky enough to see whales close to shore on West Cliff Drive. Trail continued down West Cliff Drive just as the sun was setting. It was quite 820beercheckpicturesque.  Some hashers stopped to take romantic sunset selfies. There was a second liquor check at Cock Throbbin’s house. She’s still MIA due to plantar fasciitis.  Beer check was in Garfield Park, but cut short by a cop who stopped by to politely tell us to move on.

Religion was in back of Safeway.  dBASED was RA because Accuprick, Dung Fu Grip were traveling and were outside the PST time zone.  New Kids on my Cock was Beer Fairy.  dBASED drank for doing his normal dBASED routine and missed the turkey-eagle split. We had a visitor from Korea- Semper Jackus.  Pink Cherry Licker and Fap Jack got called up for staying on West Cliff too long taking romantic sunset selfies.  New Kids on my Cock drank for being a backslider.  Virgin Ciana told a lame joke. Dog Breath accused the hares of putting the boob and package 820haresreligionchecks too close to the park.  I’m sure he was freaked out when he saw the cop at beer check.   He probably has a court order not to be within 200 yards of schools and parks where children are playing.  Religion was stopped short because the Safeway security folks came out and told us to leave. Pussy Wood was sad the she didn’t get to hear the song for the Hares, so here goes. Sing it in your head.

And the hares,

And the hares,

And the hares,

And the hares,

On her d!cky-di-doe,

Hangs down to her knees.

One black one, one white one,

And one with a bit of sh!te on,

And one with a fairy light on,

to show us the way.

And the hares,

And the hares,

And the hares,

And the hares,

On her d!cky-di-doe,

Hung down to her knees.

S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L

On On,

Shallow Hole

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