Hash 920: I hopped with I HOP

What a great trail to start of WTB weekend. We set out from the Blue Lounge and headed down to the harbor.. It was an easy stroll and the visitors and newbies were quite chatty.  After a brief stop at the public head all signs pointed to the water taxi so all aboard.

Hare Triple Racist Threat
Hare Triple Racist Threat

I am sure that the “captain” of this little floating pontoon was happy to see all of our drunk asses get on his boat. He probably regretted not calling in sick today. Just what he needed….more inebriated beach-goers barfing off the back of the boat. All for a two minute ride across the harbor.


We were told that we had time for ONE drink at the Crow’s nest Beach Party so we all raced in for a cold one with a stiff price tag and some ass wiggling dancing.

They're on a boat motherfucker
They’re on a boat motherfucker

Surprisingly we met up with some hashers who were not officially on trail. Guess that crappy reggae band was more important that running amok with your real friends!

Trying to herd our crew back across the harbor was akin to herding turtles, or cats or  gerbils.. Some folks simply would not leave the beach, others (CumFart and Taco Tramp) got stuck in a stall in the women’s bathroom and missed the boat. And they totally missed the beer check. I guess cutting in line to pee in a real toilet inside a fancy restaurant was more important than a cooler full of FREE beer.
The pack sent out a distress signal and smoke signals from their raging fire in order to get them back on track towards religion.
Accu as the RA was his usual jovial self.  We had a few virgins thanks to bakers….and more than a few bad jokes….thanks to bakers friends.
Apple bobber got in 75 hashes. Way to go kid.
The visitors from Arizona and Texas were “interesting”. Hmmmmm.

But the most disturbing yet mildly amusing portion of the down downs was the challenge to drink from visitor IHOP’s leg…the .artificial leg……….the leg that has replaced his real leg. We are not talking about merely taking a swig out of a new running shoe…..NOOOOOOO…….we are talking about a gruesome plastic leg that this bloke runs on, sweats in and god knows what else happens in that thing. But like lemming lined up on the edge of the cliff, we all assumed the position and closed our eyes and sucked some pale, viscous fluid from what I will now call “THE THING”.

Wankers around the fire
Wankers around the fire
Besides a possible case of dysentery we were rewarded with  the infamous  “IHOP” patch.
I ask you all….”was it worth it?”
The hares, Shallow Hole, Ho to Housewife and Cock Throbbin, were perfectly praised for their Thursday night adventures on the beach. and for deviating ever so slightly in order to provide us more entertainment for our hash dollar.
With lots of wood and old itchy poison oak we had a grand time.
Looks like these ladies have a foot fetish...
Looks like these ladies have a foot fetish…

Additionally, Dung Fu, who was MIA for his own hash trail last week, managed to scale El Cap and return a hero to SCH3.  He will be MIA yet again as he is setting off on another grand adventure in the wilds of Colorado. He will be missed and we will wait with baited breath for his FB and Instagram updates. Safe travels dear friend.
On On On,


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