Two of our Three Scribes were hares this day and third was absent, so for some misguided reason I decided to be the scribe instead of Puff. One week later as I was driving to the AGM I realized I had not fulfilled by duty. In the past week, I’ve had brief 15 second jolt’s that I have not fulfilled my duty. but was able to quickly forget. Today I suggested that Occasional Rapist withhold food until I write up a few silly sentences, and this was enough to make me remember just long enough.

Our most honorable and routine scribes always writing thing down so that they will  remember. My opinion is I can’t remember or there is no digital proof (hash count or hash flash), then it was unimportant, or probably didn’t happen. However, now it’s 13 days later, so you are getting only the good stuff!

This years journey into Halloween merriment started at Pono. The only reason the hares picked this place is is they were tired of the Rush Inn. Our hares of Shallow Hole and Occasional Rapist danced in as ferries this year. What would they be up to this year?

I slithered in as Dr. dBASED. Broke Bench Mountain eventually showed up as Krusty the Clown. Hugh Heffer came as some sort wench – that doesn’t even sound like a costume! Cuff My Muff was some sort of super hero, which she had to be, to get out of class. Leg Over didn’t come in costume as she claimed Puff didn’t tell her she needed one. The extent of Slownad’s costume was Rabbit ears.  Deep Stroke came as a ninja and was rarely seen.

Occasional Rapist had told me the week before the Hash she worried about a gate being closed along trail. I told her Neary Lagoon had posted sign’s it closed at Sunset, so she’d better be careful. So, the hares left the Red Room promptly at 6:33. By the time the pack left, it was dark anyway. I thought for sure the gate was going to be closed. I warned the pack at the start that if we got caught by a gate, I could assist.

Naturally, everyone assumed we be heading down Pacific Avenue for the annual parade. We all assumed wrong. We paralleled it instead. While I knew we were going to Neary Lagoon, I avoided going there directly. At a check above Depot park, I even headed towards the Pier. When no trail developed, I headed towards the railroad tracks. I got to the railroad tracks, and still found no hint of trail, so I headed away from Neary Lagoon, and towards the now approaching pack.

We got to the black lagoon and were allowed passage. However, before we passed, there was a liquor check with some vampire blood to consume. We searched for the creature in the lagoon, but our headlamps must have scared him away.

After a big circle through the dark and scary lagoon, we headed back pretty much the way we had come from, paralleling just a few blocks to the East. There were no checks in this area as the hares were afraid we’d find trail we had already run and get confused. I know that’s never happened to me before…

We headed up the steep Green street hill to the Santa Cruz mission plaza. I knew where religion was, but didn’t know where Beer check was. However, I knew that religion was over the bridge. I figured beer check would be just over the bridge. Over the bridge, and trail went right. I knew this to be away from religion, so what were the hares thinking? Half way to the Harvey West homeless zone, I realized the Hares target – the cemetery. However, due to the hares exposure to the law the previous year, they didn’t have the check in the cemetery, but across the street. Something about seeing a security guard at some point. Wimps.

The highlight of beer check was seeing that the Giants were winning game 2 of World Series. We headed off to beer check at Just Andrea’s and squeezed into her shack to seem them complete the victory and go up 2-0.

Seeing as I was running for RA the next week, I was appointed RA for the day. I can remember none of the down-downs, so they must have been all dull and boring. Will there be more to come?

Afterward, we returned to Pono for more fun. May the Hash go in Peace!

Hiya all….Just got done watching Giants kick ass into the World Series!! So I’m feeling good! OMG. Married Hashers make the best trails :)Trail 656 was fucking awesome! I loved the start at Bogeys at the Seascape Golf Course. It had literally been years since I crossed the threshold of this establishment, like try 20-25 (yes I am that old!) , and their beers we’re decently priced, $4 for good beer! Bushmills shot $6! This place is fancy but CHEAP!! Momma like! We had the chance to have a few newer hasher’s attend this fine evening. Leg over from San Diego H3, came along ( I liked to call her Leg over Miami!–it just sounds funny ok).  Virgin Eddie, he was the friend of come backer newly named hasher= Shiney Snail Trail. We had a few back slider’s but none made trail to religion, they just either showed up before and after or just at religion. OK Halloween is like next week, but Canaidian Penny Slut likes to be wierd so she came as an Utter Moo-er Cow of sorts:) Now we think maybe she has a thing for the married Hash couple as the last time she hashed was their hash trail at Little Tampico’s (the mexican sombrero hash themed hash in Soquel) This was the first time I met Shiney Snail Trail and already I can see why she makes a great hasher, funny costumes and accessories! Ok this trail wasn’t too bad, your typical 3 miles , we got to see so much greenery, but the uphill kicked ass literally!! Liquor check was tastey, Long Island Ice Tea flavored liquor. It helped make the hill worth it! But I must say this evening was warm, clear, and beautful, an epic Aptos (fogtos usually) night for sure. Now I’m not one to like golf, but walking amongst the greenway was soothing. Made me want to get to know someone with a golf cart I could start driving. Lets move on to religion: Accuprick was wasted, he started at the Med. got a ride and was even giving himself down downs by the end of the night, right on Accu!! His beerstress fairy was Canaidian Penny Slut.  Non-runner down downs =Canaidian, Leg over, Rod lover, Cuff my muff. Other down downs=Shiney snail trail for being her weird loving self (attire, accessories etc.),  Hashsit vest wearer and down down=Leg over-she found an empty liquor bottle (um ya she drank that on her own I’m sure of it), did you know Leg Over’s home hash is in Italia!! Yes the Roma Italia H3, thats cool man! She says she’s never been married that she has been a professional “Engagement Girl” of sorts, ok well more power to ya girl! Virgin Eddie showed us his “Edtoberfest half ass stupid joker”, ya ya heard it, we wanted to see more of IT. OK and the hares……..The hares were so awesome to even think of feeding us, PIZZA rocked the house!

I think TIMMY! and PUFF TMDQ have some competition for best trail of 2012 (just saying:)!!!

Ok my hasher squad, this week you better get out your fuckin’ best costumes, we are celebrating HALLOWEEN!!!!!! Meet us at Pono’s (which is so fuckin’ ONO) at Union street. Shallow will give more details soon.

be there or be nothing!!

On On your own:)

Occasional Rapist!!

This week our Hare Timmy!!! summoned the pack to the Parish House on the West Side.  Despite the threat of rain, the weather held out and there were no soggy hashers.  We had a visitor, Just Brian from Nashville, TN.  He said he didn’t do anything stupid enough for them to name him yet.  Rod Lover re-surfaced after a year and a half.  It just so happened to be his birthday and his present was a threesome with 2 tender young things, Just Christina and Virgin Jaime.  Not sure where Just Christina hashed before, but she came dressed to party wearing a shiny pink thong body suit over her running clothes.  Virgin Jaime wore a green tutu and had no idea what she was getting into.  Hugh Heifer didn’t care about anything except beer and the A’s game.   Princess Diarrhea agreed to be her wing man and stayed behind at the bar to watch the game.  Turns out they had the right idea.  It was already dark when the pack set out.  Masochistic Timmy!!! chose the hilly side of Mission Street for the majority of his trail.  Aside from big ass hills, there was a treacherously steep downhill dirt trail, followed by a steep uphill trail.  At least there was a bottle of tequila on the way up.  We finally descended down Western Drive back across Mission Street.  Timmy!!! must’ve felt remorseful, because beer check was at Santa Cruz Mountain Brewery.   We were welcomed to an open tab for all the hashers!

Religion was in the parking lot behind Safeway.  Hugh Heifer and Princess Diarrhea were there with the beer wagon!  Accuprick was RA, and he named Just Christina his Beer Fairy.  She was particularly fond of the Tiara, and enjoyed the first down down of the evening.  Next we heard from backsliders.  Rod Lover received a lovely rendition of Happy Birthday fuck you and a down down.  Cuff my Muff showed up at religion in time to take a down down.  She’s been at class on Thursday nights and thinks it is more important to get edumacated.  However, this particular evening, she told the teacher she had a headache and took off.  She was also congratulated for quitting smoking!  How awesome is that?  Deep Stroke was punished for her perversion.  What else is new?  She tried to climb into a kiddy cart in front of Safeway.  Accuprick gave himself a down down for “cultural sensitivity” in recognition of National Coming Out Day.   Our visitor, Just Brian was officially welcomed to the hash.  Our very own GA Timmy!!! was punished for the crime of not remembering that I, Shallow Hole, was part of mismanagement.  He blamed it on alcohol, weed and old age.  Dementia is a possibility,considering he is old enough to be retired.  Sounds like I have a free pass to make fun of him and spread nasty rumors about him, because I know he never reads my hash trash!  For instance, I heard Deep Stroke is in the process of staging a coo against him to elect an all-female mismanagement for next year.  Next, Virgin Jaime delighted the pack by showing her butt.  We had the very unusual Surf City H3 occurrence of 2 namings in one night!  Just Christina was sent away while the pack deliberated and brought back 3 snails she found on the ground, so she was named Shiny Snail Trail.  Just Ted, a mathematician, was named Schlong Division!  And last but not least, the Hare………………………

See everybody this Thursday 10/18/12 at Bogey’s Bar & Grill in Seascape Golf Club, 610 Clubhouse Dr., Aptos, where we will be in pursuit of the Princess Diarrhea and Thmp-Thmp, AKA “The Squirrel”

On On,

Shallow Hole

P.S.  Get your costumes out for the Halloweenie Hash on 10/25/12!  Occasional Rapist and I are planning a frightening trail for you wankers.  And make sure you wear something you can run in!

It was almost the perfect night in Boulder Creek, with almost a full moon, we found ourselves at the lovely Boulder Creek Brewery. It was the un-usual pack, with Just Jeff, and Just Ted and backslider Slonad, Cum Lord, and Get up and run bitch, and Goat Blower thrown into the mix. When I arrived the hare pair Pussy Galore and Too drink to fuck we’re already setting trail. We downed our beers quickly and did circle up, Slonad got to wear the hashshit vest. This trail was a long ass circle jerk, we ran by the Junction park by the river, crossed Hwy 9 and ran up the hill, ran down a few blocks until a dirt path which connected back to Hwy 9, down Hwy 9. I guess we ran too slow as we already saw the pack back over on the otherside of hwy 9 so we ditched trail and crossed back over Hwy 9. We did pass a lovely church with beautiful stain glass windows, and before we knew it we bumped into the pack sitting on their arses sucking up beer! This was at BC elementery my dear, just below the cemetary-am I missing something here? Ok RA was Accu, his mistress of cervesa Ms. Goat Blower herself, Slonad got first down down for trying to sell his company flashlight on trail, dBASED for shedding skin on trail from his open (ok wrapped) moped rash wound, Too drunk to fuck got his first hare patch! Get up and run bitch missplaced Too drunk to fuck’s flour (butt he managed without it) Just Ted drank beer out of his shoe. I got down down w/ Nipple butt and Tiny Whiney Bitch for letting Nipple butt run loose and TWB for saving the day. Ok I can’t re-hash this anylonger, hope you learned a lot. This week we’ll gather at the Blue Lounge (not to be mistaken for the Blue Lagoon) on Seabright. Can’t wait to get beaten up by the next hare pair.

I’m watching the presidential debate and its stressing me out time for a beer….

On and On

Occasional Rapist:)