All posts by Occ. Rap.

# 763 Hash Trash

Two namings took place on this night. After much diliberating drunk drinking, we came up with two great ones.  Trail start was at Beer Thirty, we love this place, especially when we get the outside all to ourselves. Trio of hares, Bacon Queef (virgin haring!), PCL and Fap Jack. We had 2 visitor’s from LAH3, Damien the Antichrist and his spouse Pot Ho, they looked like they had fun. We had a virgin, Giant Asexual made cum, Virgin Schuyler, now with a name like that we will have fun naming you in the near future:).  Trail was ultra shitty, that’s what happen’s when hares are in the odd number. To note though, was how Bacon Queef being a virgin hare and all, calmly explained to a security guard/cop at a mobile home park what the hell she was doing.  Keep calm and just throw flour! LOL. I measured trail and from what I remember it was like 3.8. Many short cutted the last loop around the Wharf road/school. I didn’t! Everyone missed a different loop, but that’s a long story. OK, RA was TIMMY!, beer fairy dBASED. We had religion in the parking lot next to Micheal’s on Main. We congradulated Dung-Fu Grip on his 75th analversary with Surf City! Virgin Schuyler told a lame joke, but since he had many harriette’s lined up in front of him he decided to also “moon” us. We named Just Steve first. It took a bit, but….please welcome “Stub Rub”! It could have been worse, you could have been named, ‘You Bitch you Whine’, Yeasty Boy, Stumpi, Wiggy 9 Finger’s, Phantom Finger Fucker, McNubbin’, Stupid Queso, District 9? LOL. Just Robin was welcomed to the hash…as “Cock Throbbin’ “, you could have been, Cockin Robin, Nice Cock, 40 “P” cock, Small town pussy, High School Drunk out:) In the end I think both of these lovely moniker’s fit them well. Up soon to name will be Just Kory if he keeps on cumming, and the hares!

On On Occasional Rapist:0

Hobo (didn’t-go) back to school Hash Trash #759

We started at El Jardin, a great mexican hangout off Capitola road and 7th ave. Trifecta hares Twisted Fister, Diddler on the Roofie, and Fucked-Over-Fest tortured us on this night. Trail was~ 3.67 miles from start to beer check for me. We ran around neighborhoods that had some type of school. Up La Fonda, this is where old ‘alternative’ school “Loma Prieta” used to reside, and where the Liquor Check was-in the woods( big bottle of JD) and this is where a few of my drop-out stoner friends finished their HS diploma, accross the street from Harbor High School, which happend to be my high school-Go Pirates!, I graduated there in 1984! This year is my.. gulp, 30th reunion! LOL. Anyhow, there was a long-ass back check over the newly completed La Fonda Ave. bridge over Hwy 1, real trail went through the back of Harbor High up the little alley way to Soquel, through what we know now as Hobo Hotel land. Then off over towards Green Acres Elementry, Live Oak School est. 1872! Beer Check was at Fucked-Over-Fest’s Grandma’s house. How cool is that? The family stayed in though. Long ass BC. We ended up at Diddler’s house for Religion which was ~ 1 mile away from BC. Just Heather was beer fairy, Accuprick RA. Noted task of the evening was to rename Just Jeremiah, and we did it well, his new name, drum roll…..”Just Pussy Foot!” He likes his Ugg boots like his women. Ok and the hares……thanks for bringing back school memories!

See you cats tonight at Brady’s Yacht Club, dress up as Pirates and or Wenches bitches!………..Occasional Rapist!

Hash Trash #757

Helloooooo….a lot has happend since hash 757. But let’s relive it! Shallow Hole and Dung-Fu-Grip took us up Empire Grade near Twin Gates, for the start of this shiggi-licious hash trail. Shallow brought 2 virgin’s, racist from her running group. Virgin’s Robin and Heather. One even wore a racist shirt! Slonad also brought virgins, Kory and Steve. Virgin Steve’s spouse Just Lori apparently hadn’t hashed in 2 years. Glad to see keeping it in the family! Just Tisha made Virgin Alice cum! Trail was one big loop in the park so to speak. We ran through Gray Whale Ranch part of Wilder ranch and then crossed back over Empire Grade in another loop. Just Karee was confused and didn’t think it was her 5th hash yet, but by dBASED and Puff’s observational skills or hash count it was her 5th, so the thinking caps we’re on! About 1-2 miles in there was a BW check of Manischewitz Concord Grape wine, nasty, but appreciated! A nice bridge crossing. It appeared most of the virgins made it to beer check first, LOL. I measured ~3.7 miles to beer check. (Trail map as measured by dBASED.) Check out this map, what do you see? I tried to see something but no. Beer check was beside a memorial burial of a lost cyclist whom apparently was hit by a car on Empire Grade. We drank to him! Then the long ass mile walk back down Empire Grade to Religion/start of trail. We carried the beer trough off road so we wouldn’t get busted and conducted business. Dog Breath was TIMMY!’s beer fairy. Noted down down’s are FRB’s which were most of the virgins!, Just Lori for making it back after 2 years for her 3rd hash run!, Just Karee and Bacon Queef for learning ‘just how to pee in the woods whilst hashing’, Dung-Fu-Grip’s 69th Analversary hash!! And all the Virgins we’re called up. We heard stupid jokes from most but got a nice butt flash from Kory! Then the naming of Just Karee……after much diliberation….Welcome to the hash, ‘Tits and Game!’ (can you tell where or whom she works for?). Yaay! I personally really liked this trail, running off road is so much fun! Creamy Swallow hates his name and wants a renaming. We will grant this no problemo, might take awhile but we shall come up with something far more insulting! And the Hares..!!

On On to this week’s hash which will start at El Jardin, on Capitola road, we have 2 new hares so this should be interesting!

Til then wanker’s!

Occasional Rapist

W2B 2014 Pre-Lube Hash #753- Toga Toga Toga!

The gang gathered at Bocci’s Cellar, hare duo Twisted Fister and Fap Jack. There was a good turnout- Toga themed hash had almost everyone wearing a sheet! PCL watched a video on how to wrap a sheet, she helped a few hashers in need. We had virgins, visitors, backslider’s, and a naming! Trail I measured ~3.47 with a LC on the river levee at ~ 1 mile- now thats what I’m talking about. BC was at the end near religion. Another shitty long-ass trail b/t checks! But running in Toga’s was fun, we all made good” people”watching through downtown and over Hwy 1. See my map for where we went, . Religion Advisor was Accuprick, and Just Karee his beer fairy. Just Karee made virgin Paul cum.  She brought her canine buddy along too, both dogs sported a mini-togas. We had also another virgin named Tish, internet made her cum, apparently some friends of hers explained about the H3, so she emailed dBASED. Alas jokes we’re told, backslider’s drank (Accuprick, Deep Stroke and The Human Pube). We were mooned by Virgin Tish after she failed at her joke! Just Andrew whom admirely keeps cumming back was a racist, apparently he didn’t get the Toga memo and he was off by one night for the right themed hash! Just Marisol got a name! Welcome to the hash Bacon Queef. She might have told us a little too much information that night, so the name is very fitting if you were there! Twisted Fister got his 10th Hare patch-way to go Bro! And the hares!…….

More to follow for deets from W2B I wasn’t there the whole time so I’ll let other scribettes explain..

On on Occasional Rapist

Hash Trash #750 Happy Birthday ‘merica!

When the hash celebrates America’s birthday we do it right. Princess Di(arrhea) and Thmp Thmp brought us to Brommer street park. We drank right in plain view in the parking lot, no coppus bust us. Trail was promised to be short, I tracked 2.78 miles. Your basic circle jerk, traipsing through nice neighborhoods. We headed down 30th over Capitola Rd. Along Catalina drive, there’s a nice alley way leading to the Coffee Lane park where neighbors have fences plastered with art of their choice, pretty cool. They even have a swing there. Then we circled on right and then had a liquor check, I remembered spiced whiskey? Dude it feels like an eternity since last week:) Forgive my half-minded memory loss! Ok then circled on right alongside 40th-41st ave.’s through parking lots, to right by Pier 1, and through behind Satellite Dialysis ( I had to hide from co-worker’s getting off shift at this point) and then through the back of Brown Ranch Shopping Center, past the credit union there, and then some senior assisted living place. There’s a nice break in the wall which cuts into Sommerfield Ave.. We saw a huge blue and yellow McKaw parrot in a tree! We then continued over Capitola Rd. & over to Thompson ave. to Brommer on right back to start. BC was along Brommer street in a field, a Bike Jump park, never even knew that was there! Kids can be so darn creative! Religion then proceeded a few feet away there. TIMMY! acted as RA and Choka Cola his beer fairy. Noted we had vistors from the CANN’d hash, Five Finger Discunt, Under Mother Fucker, and newly named Penis, Penis, Penis! I love saying that! Just Jeff and Snapping Twat came back also. And our lovely Deep Stroke came all over from SF! We made it quick so we could go get some weenies roasted. Noted analversaries: Hairy Potter finished his 175th SCH3 Hash with us! and Pink Cherry Licker finished up her 75th Hash! Get a life man… And the hares!….

Weenie roast ‘america party got down at the Brommer street park over the hump past the field, never even knew that picnic area was there, kind of cool to be out of sight from the street! No coppus got us. Thanks to our Hares and helpers we had a fine meal of veggie and meat Weenie hot diggity dogs done up in style (w/condi’s) cooked on a hand carried from home gas grill! Chips, dip and flag cookies! Plenti-o-cold-Beer too!  On On we went into our 4th of July partaaaay weekends!! ….Yee fuckin’ ha!

See y’ all tonight I’ll be aiding the dBASED for his Bday Hash, Aptos BBQ!

On On-Occasional

Hash Trash # 748

Hares Cumcerto and Twisted drugged us to Kauboi, Aptos. It was Cumcerto’s Birthday hash! Always a good time getting sake and sushi at Kauboi! We had a fun turnout.  Little Micah showed up standing on her own, soon she will be hashing with us! But not this night. Choka Cola took her home while Hairy Potter did trail. Trail went North on Soquel to Aptos Rancho Road into Nisene, this is where the fun began. I can’t remember how many water crossings we did but it was a lot, I ended up just walking thru the creek after 3. There was a tastey Liquor Check right before hitting Aptos park, tasted like Coconut Liquor and Grapefruit juice. We then trumped thru the park and up the hill towards the railroad tracks/tressle all the way to Seacliff, where we passed the new Mariianne’s ice cream shop (old Bob’s Liquor) at first I notice the new paint job (wasn’t Bob’s red anymore) then realized oh my it’s not Bob’s anymore its Marianne’s ice cream and it was packed with kids! Trail then went down into Seacliff state beach by the infamous SS Palo Alto cement ship. Who would sail upon a cement ship? Not I. Anyhoot, DUH yes trail commenced UP the longest set of stairs known in Aptos, by the time you get to the top you definately are reaching for some O2. Across the field to Seacliff Dr. and the views we’re beautiful of course! The little trail leading down to Aptos Creek road and then to Mooshead Dr. Head who said Head! BC as we suspected under the Hwy 1 bridge on the turn by the creek. Such a good BC. We hung out in what seemed like forever, but apparently forever wasn’t long enough, as Twat did you Say and Human Pube and Monthly Friend we’re still in the field (trail) and we missed them (sorry guys next time we wait!). Anyhow we assumed maybe they ditched trail. So back behind Kauboi on the road into Aptos Park we had religion. Accuprick and our oldtime hasher Snapping Twat acted as his Beer fairy. Snapping Twat came with her spouse Just Jeff. Canaidian Penny Slut drank first down down for not even doing trail, something about being injured. Then the 1/2 minds drank for not making it to BC, Monthly Friend, Twat and Human Pube. Newer hashers: Just Jeff, Just Evan. Virgin Ali. Backsliders: Hairy Potter, PlaSTIC pUSSY? I can’t remember who else. Anyhow: Just Evan almost got a name, Micro penis or cock but since he did’nt prove he had one we decided next time! Watch your words young man! LOL. Some Chivalry on trail was had, apparently Finger Nips witnessed a large steelhead swimming up stream on one of the water crossings and she decided to try to catch it, over she went and her cell phone fell in the creek and she twisted up her ankle. She was determined to get Mortal Enema to the BC so Mortal Enema helped her walk to BC. Fap Jack found her cell phone in the creek! I love how we all work together! Virgin Ali whom I think Plastic Pussy made cum? sang a song in Farsi, which translated to “I’m so fucked up, I am drunk, drunk as a skunk” or something like that. Analversaries 125 hashes done by Princess Di-arrhea!, and 150th Hash by Accuprick! Get a life get life get a life life life! dBASED was demented about trail at some point but I can’t even remember that down down! And the Hares! Thanks for a fun trail!!

On On tonight at West Remote Parking lot for start at 6:33PM, see ya there!

Occasional Rapist