Remind me again why we thought it would be a good idea to cram 40 hashers into Gildas teeny tiny bar that really only has room for 6 very thin people??
Oh never mind….it was Timmy’s “bright” idea!
With most of the hashers spilling out into the restaurants lobby and onto the wharf itself, Accuprick decides to set up his famous
brightly coloredkinesiology taping clinic on those comfy leatherette benches. Those benches that are supposed to be used by real patrons of Gildas waiting to get a coveted window table.
Dr Accu instructs CumFartZone to lay down on said bench with her ass up in the air and wiggle into some strange position just so he could tape her ankle………RIGHT!!!!!! If he wanted to see her ass he could have just asked nicely.
Meanwhile the Mob bosses, aka Pinky and Fap are frantically trying to round up this unruly group to start this week’s hash by giving us the 5 minute countdown.
Finally this rather large boisterous group assembles on the wharf for the start….and off we go….chasing down Timmy and Occasional Rapist.
Another weekly cluster fuck.
Oh Joy….but this time the group is easily amused by wandering around the empty boardwalk.
Bacon Queef and Pinky find the wooden cutouts of the mermaids, and place their heads atop the fake bodies to show off their coconuts….to the delight of “just wendy” and friends.
“Just Wendy” brought along a gaggle of newbies, perhaps to curry favor with us for her upcoming naming. Perhaps like our home boy Steph (Curry) she could end up with some bonus 3’s….or like Fap she could whip up some smelly curry to fill our bellies with something other than shitty beer.
But no, her newbie friends decide that they can’t do the trail because they are hungry…so they bail out before we even hit the boardwalk. How lame is that! Get some new friends that can hang. Or feed them before the hash. Do whatever you need to do to take care of your buddies….we do need new hashers but seriously….not that badly!!!!
Anyways…back to the trail…that lovely trail which meandered over an elevated boardwalk over a dark lagoon with menacing sea creatures lurking below. Oh, my bad. That was simply Dog Breath waiting for some scraps.
On to the end…the bitter end…..the end that was just supposed to be an easy 3 miles….the end that was more like 4 1/2 or 5 miles…..the end of the rainbow below the railroad bridge.
That magical place where beer and beer fairies abound….along with visitors from foreign countries with strange accents and proclivities.
The end was raucous to say the least. I will spare you the details.
All I remember was some down downs….some BS about missing a bunch of atmospheric river events. Blah Blah Blah.