Category Archives: SCH3 Announcements

Surf City H3 Announcements

Call for Nominations! AGM is Cumming Nov. 12!

Harriers and Harriettes,

It’s time to start setting your half-minds on erecting your new Mismanagement for Surf City’s Year 15! Feel free to nominate who you think the Hash could rely on for any of these positions (as long as they agree to it first­–consent is sexy!):

GM (Grand Master)
Hare Raiser
Religious Advisors
Social Sec (new position!)
Hash Scribes

Descriptions of all of the positions are at the bottom of this message. Your new GM might make a few changes to the descriptions and delegations after the erection, but it’s a good guideline for now. Every position is important for pulling off the joy of Hashing every week. It takes fucking village! Yes! You can nominate yourself for something. Send nominations to Princess Diarrhea by emailing chadandjill -at-

We also want your nominations for:
Worst Trail
Best Trail
Stupidest Act on Trail
Biggest Wanker

Details, schmetails:
AGM – Surf City H3’s Anal General Meeting
Thursday, November 12th, 6:33pm
El Palomar, in the “fiesta room”, 1336 Pacific Ave, Santa Cruz, CA 95060
$25 will feed, booze and schwag you. Bring extra $ in case we have to cut you off.
Hares Princess Di(arrhea) & Thmp-Thmp will be off at 7:00 for a short trail.
Please RSVP if you can cum so we can get a head count (who said head?). You can do this by emailing me chadandjill -at- or replying to the Facebook event.

Princess Di(arrhea) & Thmp-Thmp


Surf City H3 Mismanagement Positions – Year 14

We are a disorganization of officers who work for free. All regular funds are spent on beer, snacks, haberdashery, events, and other necessary kennel expenses (like Valtrex™). All charity event funds are donated. These Wankers do their damnedest providing for good times each week. Honor!

Beer Meister
This is unquestionably the most important position in the Hash. The Beer Meister has the weighty responsibility of making sure that the lifeblood of Hashing is available at each and every Hash event. He/she keeps constant vigilance to find the finest beers at reasonable prices, always has coolers in the back of his truck, cases of beer in his garage, and reliably brings drinks and snacks for after trail. He transports kegs and disposes of the recycling and trash. While this might be a pain in the ass job, it’s undoubtedly the most important one to the Hash.

Grand Master/Grand Mattress (GM)
Thmp-Thmp & Princess Diarrhea
The grand poobah of the Hash. Gispert’s legacy. The GM has the distinctive dishonor of misleading Mismanagement, setting the year’s Hash events calendar, planning and coordinating events, delegating duties, calling meetings, and occasionally bailing the Hash out of trouble. Weekly, the GM approves trail announcements, passes out trail chalk for the pack, provides chalk talk to Virgins and Visitors, and is the timekeeper for the night’s chain of events. Keeper of the Hashit and (somewhat) sober herder of drunk hounds at events. A successful GM makes these chores seem transparent to the pack, but it is much work nevertheless.

Pink Cherry Licker & FapJack
This is a person who has a knack for swag, a head for business (who said head?), and the showmanship of P.T. Barnum. She/he’s responsible for the design, procurement, warehousing, merchandising, and vending of items of apparel and various trinkets to the Hash. Procures kennel, award and event patches. Prior flea market or circus midway experience preferred.

Weekly Volunteer
She/he chooses well-thought-out locations for start, trail, beer check, religion, and on-on-on. Cums prepared to announce the trail’s start location at religion the week before. Writes up a trail announcement with trail details and submits it well before Thursday. Buys flour and brings something to carry it in to lay trail. Buys water and other fluids for beer check and liquor/bum wine check (the following week you will be paid back $2 per attendee). Always cums prepared to be lambasted for their shitty trail! Trail gives us something to do besides drink beer, so this is undoubtedly the second most important position of the Hash.

Hare Raiser
Twisted Fister
The Hare Raiser makes sure that there’s a hare (or hares) for each Hash, maintains the Hare Line on the website and makes sure the Hare makes the start location known to the Hash well in advance of Hash day. He/she recruits hares and matches new hares with experienced ones. Every Hasher is expected to set a Hash periodically. The Hare Raiser IS the hare if he can’t find anyone else to do it. Misguides inexperienced hares to prepare them to successfully lay a trail and to fully understand their hare responsibilities.

Hash Cash
Puff the Magic Drag Queen
The stingy holder of the purse strings. Keeps track of what comes in and what goes out (commonly referred to as “the old in and out”). Collects Hash cash at the start of each Hash, records each Hash attendee’s name for the On-Sec, and provides reimbursement for food and drinks used at the Hash. Hash Cash is responsible for protecting the Hash’s assets and general accounting of the funds. This trustworthy soul must withstand the whining of the Hares who have overspent, the whimpering of those who forgot their fees, and watch out for late-comers trying to dodge the fee. This position is appointed by the GM.

Hash Flash
Keeper of the Camera: Puff the Magic Drag Queen
Anyone can volunteer from week to week to capture for posterity all embarrassing Hash moments. The Hash flash must have an acute sense of the absurd to know what to take photos of and to write snarky captions about them. The Keeper of the Camera must have a small degree of reliability to bring the Hash camera and upload the photos to the Hash’s Flickr album.

Hash Scribe
Shallow Hole, Ho to Housewife & Cock Throbbin
The Hash Scribe does the write-up of each r*n and disseminates said Hash Trash. There are several good reasons to become scribe. The most important is that you get to write down anything dumb and stupid that your fellow Hashers have done on trail, while avoiding writing about all the dumb and stupid things you have done on trail.

This position is the masochist’s dream and the nerd’s delight. She/he deciphers the Hash Cash’s scribbles as to who attended, tallies the Hash Count each week, manages the member database, and updates the email Hound Directory. He’s the webmaster, manages the Yahoo Groups email list and Facebook page and sets up the yearly Hash Google calendar. Prints the business cards. Boring stuff to say the least, but vital.

Social Sec
New Position for Year 15!
The slutty mouth of the kennel! She/he reliably posts and promotes event and weekly trail announcements far and wide via social media, email lists and calendars. Keeps an eye on other kennels’ postings for interesting events and shares them back with SCH3. Keeps a finger on the throbbing member of Hash events.

Religious Advisor
AccuPrick & Dung Fu Grip
Keeper of the faith. Enforcer of the scriptures. She/he is the keeper of the Sacred Rules of Hashing (there are no rules, only traditions) and comes up with sufficiently plausible lies to both punish and protect the (not-so-)innocent. He leads circle after trail is finished, including leading in song and namings, and doles out punishment with down-downs. Heed his warnings of “HASH HUSH!” because warm shitty beer will still be warm after your ass is frozen from parking it on an ice block.

Shout out to and for their great material we thieved from. Thanks, guys! xo

In Loving Memory of Last Call Norm

2008 Red Dress R*n Hash 409

Our beloved Normie quietly passed away yesterday afternoon following a battle with cancer. We all loved her and will always keep her in our hearts.

Normie was a True Blue Hasher, Beer Meister extraordinaire, and was responsible for bringing WomenCARE to the Surf City’s Red Dress R*n as our special charity. She received their caring services and made sure to help give back to them. Sadly, last Saturday was Normie’s final Surf City RDR. We’ll be sure to remember and honor her in the years ahead. The donations we collected on Saturday were donated to WomenCARE in her memory.

Pearl Necklace and his family are also in our hearts. If you’d like to offer help, you can do it here.

Come by 100h7 Club this Sunday May 17th at 2pm to share stories and toast to sweet Normie.

Here’s to Sister Hasher…

-Princess Di(arrhea) & Thmp-Thmp

Surf City H3 Year 14

Harriers and Harriettes,

Thirteen was quite a year, right? We named 19 Hashers (at least), won Sloshed Ball, Occasional Rapist hared 15! trails, Banana Basher hit 100! hares, Puff hit 750! hashes, Timmy!!! officially became a senior shitizen, nobody knows which way dBASED went, and our longtime Beer Meistress lugged her last cooler load. Ahhh, sweet beer-soaked mammaries of Year 13…. and another year of hashing has hit the shit can.

Sooo…looking ahead (who said head?), here are the big wieners from the AGM erection and your Year 14 Mismanagement:
Scribes – Shallow Hole, Ho to Housewife and Cock Throbbin
RAs – AccuPrick and Dung-Fu Grip
Hare Raiser – Twisted Fister
Co-Haberdashers – FapJack and Pink Cherry Licker
Beer Meister – Timmy!!!
On-Sec – dBASED
Co-GMs – Thmp-Thmp and Princess Di(arrhea)

A very important thing about Year 14…straight up, we don’t want anyone putting themselves or others in danger on the roads. Are you willing to offer post-hash crash space to a wanker who should not drive? Please let me know and mention what part of town you live in. A list will be put together along with taxi phone numbers on small laminated cards for everyone’s lanyard.

Got ideas about stuff? We do have traditions, but there’s always room for fun new ones! We’ll have some open Mismanagement meetings this year, so cum share your idears. The first one will be in January (date TBD).

Cheers to another year of beer, boobs and song!

Princess Di(arrhea)

AGM! Anal General Meeting – November 6th

Harriers and Harriettes,

It’s time to start setting your half-minds on erecting your new Mismanagement for SCH3 Year 14. Feel free to nominate anyone who you think is at least semi-worthy of serving the Hash…especially serving the Hash BEER! Here’s what’ll be up for vote:

Beermeister (The Hippy needs a rest!)
Hare Raiser
Religious Advisors
Haberdasher/Merch Bitch

Apparently Thmp-Thmp and I are serving a 2-year sentence as Grand Master and Grand Mattress, so we won’t be erecting a new GM this time around…BUTT…if you want to throw us out of orifice, feel free to write in some other poor wank. Speaking of wanks, get a wank’s okay before you nominate them. Yes! you can nominate yourself for something if you think you’re pretty fuckin’ special. 😛 Send nominations to me by emailing or send me a FB message.

We also want your nominations for:
Worst Trail
Best Trail
Best Hash Trash
Biggest Wanker
Stupidest Act on Trail

Details, shmetails:
AGM – Surf City H3’s Anal General Meeting/Hash 770
Thursday, November 6th, 6:33pm
El Palomar, in the “fiesta room”, 1336 Pacific Ave, Santa Cruz, CA 95060
$20 will feed you and beer you
Hares: Princess Di(arrhea) + Thmp-Thmp

Princess Di(arrhea)

Wharf to Barf Weekend is Here!‏

Oh yes, it is going down…starting TODAY!

Surf City H3’s
July 24-27, 2014
Santa Cruz

We present to you your itinerary of weekend debauchery:

If you haven’t rego’d yet, it’s not too late to join the fun!! Tonight is a usual Thursday hash that also happens to be the W2B Pre-Lube TOGA! TOGA! TOGA! Hash, starting at Bocci’s Cellar. Walk-up prices during the W2B weekend are $8 each for the Friday Pub Crawl (dress like a r*cist) and Sunday Hangover Hash. It’s just $45 for the Saturday Hash/Picnic/Swag. If you expect to be a walk-up for the Picnic, please let Princess or Thmp know in advance if you can so we’ll bring enough grub and grog.

YES, SWAG IS STILL AVAILABLE! Oh shit! Extra swag will be sold during the event if you want to bring some back to your envious kennel mates and will also be sold after the event if you can’t cum (it happens).

So rev up your livers and let’s get it on-on!

-Princess Di(arrhea) & Thmp-Thmp

Hash 726

Details, details, details.

All you REALLY need to know is the start for Hash 726 is the Crepe Place. However, knowing some of you half-minds will find that insufficient, I’ll impart a few other useless details in your direction. It’s going to be cold Thursday night so trail will be short. There is no poison oak encounter planned. Religion will be at Dung-Fu Grip and Puff’s cave but Beer Check will not. Four-legged as well as two-legged hounds are welcome.

That should be enough even for the most simple-minded among you.